A Day In The Life of a Part-Time Stay-At-Home Mom

The kids started a new school year yesterday! I could rant about the teacher shortage and my overall displeasure with the current situation at their school. I could celebrate the fact that both kids had a good first day and happily reconnected with friends. But I'm not going to write about those things. Instead, I am going to give you the peek into my daily life that you never requested. 

Master of My Domain: The Empty House!

This morning started as usual. I probably snoozed my alarm once, got up, got dressed, made my bed, and turned off the porch light. The dog followed me around and I tried to keep her wagging tail from hitting any walls because "Shhh! The kids are still sleeping!" Said kids got up shortly after me. One of them got dressed, packed their backpack, ate their breakfast, washed their dishes, and even helped me with a few things, easy-peasy. The other kid got up, dug around in their too-dark bedroom for a specific Lego or two, received multiple redirections and statements from me, then finally made it to the table for breakfast.

I went outside to feed the dog, fed the indoor cats, then went into my backyard to feed the outdoor cats and water the garden. Upon returning to the kitchen, I discovered that the second aforementioned child was no longer at the table. That's when my awesome mom/former teacher brain came up with the genius idea of comparing our morning routine to a video game. 

Me: "You cannot leave this room until you have completed every task within it. Then you can move to the next level of the Morning Game."

Child: "But most games I can leave the room and just walk out the door."

Me: "Yes, but then you don't beat the level. In the Morning Game, you need to do all the little side-quests and earn more points in the kitchen before moving to the living room."

I think I won that discussion. The kid kept "earning coins" and asking me what prize they got for finishing the cereal, and whatnot. I explained the the prize is finishing the cereal and getting to wash the bowl, before packing the lunch and exiting the kitchen level. Very exciting, I know, but it seemed to work. 

This is my life. 

The kids and I eventually walked out the door. 

I brought the dog and we split from the kids at a corner; they headed to school while the pup and I continued in a different direction. I walked about a mile and half and talked to my mommy on the phone the entire time. This is a morning tradition that went away when my kids were home all summer and we slept in more often. I'm glad to get back into this routine because walking in the mornings makes my heart happy. 

I came home and did some yoga (because yoga also makes my heart happy), took a shower, set my robot to vacuum, called a rental place about a family reunion trip next summer, then left to meet some of my best friends for food. Next time you want brunch in my town and it happens to be a Wednesday when the yummy downtown bakeries are closed, I suggest you go to the cafe at the library for a delicious little meal and coffee. I had avocado toast and a fancy latte because I'm a millennial, but there are also many choices available for you non-millennials. 

After that visit and delicious meal, I made a stop at a local cemetery because it's August 24th and that's what I have been doing on August 24th for 18 years now. My friend Dawnette was 19 years old when she died by suicide 19 years ago. She was just a kid. We were just a bunch of kids. So here is my biannual reminder (I get this way on her birthday, too, so watch out.) that you matter. Yes, you! Even with your depression, drug addiction, or suicidal thoughts... you matter so much. Thank you for surviving through those dark days and being here today. Please stay here on this planet with me tomorrow. I know mental healthcare is a shit show, but I urge you to reach out and get help if you're struggling. 

Oof. Heavy. Sorry. Just be glad you weren't at the cemetery earlier to witness me suddenly bursting into tears. 

After checking my eyeliner, I went to Target to return some back to school purchases that were the wrong size (ten year old bean pole problems) or the wrong style ('tween problems). I also bought deodorant. Then I came home thinking I would sit and read for a bit because I still had an hour before school got out, and reading makes my heart happy. Instead I cleaned the toilet. That's right! Mom's first day of a quiet, empty house at the start of a new school year and she cleans. the. toilet. 

I also reset all of the alarms on my phone to remind me to pick my children up from school. Alarms are my best friends. 

And now I'm here. Not reading, but I am writing, because writing also makes my heart happy. 

What are you going to do to make your heart happy today?

Well Well Well

This is my first blog post in 2022. 
This is my first blog post in 2022?!?!?

It's already the end of July. What the hell have I been doing with my time? 

I. Have. No. Idea. 

Really. I don't. Maybe my brains are broken because we're 2.25 years into a global pandemic that won't go away (because people don't seem to understand concepts around public health) and every day for the past 821 days feels like The Song That Never Ends. Who knows what I've been up to? Who even knows what day it is, or what year for that matter?!?

The entirety of 2022 has been an interesting time at work. The vet practice is under new ownership! It has been very exciting to watch my old-friend-turned-new-boss put many of her great ideas into motion. Our office is growing and changing in awesome ways, but all of the changes have created many stressful days at work. Painting and remodeling meant there were weeks when things were moved around hectically and it was difficult to find what I needed when I needed it. Upgrades in technology have meant learning new phone systems and computer programs, which made me feel slow and inefficient until I got the hang of things. We're going through another learning curve right now with new computer software, and we're ironing out the wrinkles as we find them. It will all be great when we're efficiently using these new tools, but at the moment... I'm exhausted. I dream about work when I'm asleep at night. I worry about work when I'm lying awake at night. 

Here are some fun things (that are not work) that have broken up the monotony of my life in 2022 so far: Day trips to the beach, kid sleepovers and middle school drama, an anniversary weekend in Napa, pet-sitting multiple times for various people, visits with friends from out of town, food and drinks with amazing coworkers, Book Group with my ExMormon ladies, playing D&D with dearest friends, going on walks with my dog, friend-dates, talking on the phone with my mama, getting a third piercing on each earlobe. 

Lots of little things have happened this year, but nothing that necessitates an entire blog post.

Truthfully, I haven't been writing here because I'm still smack dab in the middle of complex stories that aren't only mine to tell. I shouldn't write about the complexities of parenting a kid who is exploring their identity as a member of a marginalized community while the story is still unfolding and the main character isn't me. I shouldn't write about the difficulties of navigating a marriage with someone who holds values opposite to mine because the plot is still unraveling and the relationship is still evolving and some people (Not me, obviously. Ha!) don't want all of their dirty laundry aired publicly on the internet.

Whatever the reasons that I haven't written, the important thing is that I am writing right now. Hopefully I'll have something else to write about again, soon.

(Thanks, Candace, for mentioning this blog and inspiring me to add to it a little bit.)